That's right. I'd rather embarrass myself than give someone else the pleasure, so here are some pix that I would have destroyed long ago were I a normal, self-respecting human being. Instead I will chronologically illustrate my life below. Enjoy!
I don't think I look exactly human here. Simian perhaps.
This is one of those oh-so awkward grammar school pictures. And no, I was not stoned, come on. It was only 2nd Period.
Trying out the porn mustache while poking a Chihuahua during a trip home from college. Ron Jeremy is jealous. And the Taco Bell dog is very nervous.
The evolution of "That Guy" is complete. A fully "matured" McShowoff exhibits some false modesty.
I know what you're thinking. How can these pictures be considered embarrassing when I've already posted these? Good question. Probably because in the photos above (the first three anyway) I wasn't TRYING to look like a moron. It's all about controlling the image.